I grew up in a small village with around 1,600 inhabitants in a mountainous region of Norway and got my driver’s license on half-empty, snowy roads with one intersection and one crosswalk. I can drive well in the dark and know exactly how to handle a snow-covered country road. I can start in second gear on black ice, drift, and put on snow chains. You can’t learn to avoid colliding with a moose, but I know what they look like in real life.

Then I moved to the Ruhr area, with more than 5 million people. Not all of them use the A40, but it is one of the most heavily used highways in Germany and almost impossible to avoid if you live in this area.

City driving, highways, traffic jams, construction sites, the Breitscheid interchange, tight parking garages, a thousand directions and possibilities – when I think back to this „new beginning,“ my hands still sweat a little.

I had to relearn driving at 29. At first, I thought it would come naturally, but it was far too stressful, and I was constantly afraid of doing something wrong, reacting too late, or causing accidents. Every drive felt like a constant sprint, and I was always completely exhausted afterward. So exhausted that I tried to avoid driving as much as possible.

I could only shine on short trips in winter when there was an unexpected amount of snow and ice, and „everyone else“ stayed home.

My partner at the time, an incredibly good and patient driver, supported me as much as he could, but the real solution came when I took professional driving lessons with a nice, understanding, and very good driving instructor.

That was a relief! The process took time, and I had to practice a lot, but with the assurance that someone was sitting next to me who knew exactly what to do, I was able to practice the daily „stop-and-go“ on the A40 bit by bit and gradually even found joy in cruising on half-empty highways at higher speeds. Eventually, I was able to breathe properly while driving and even sit behind the wheel with a smile.

Oh yes, and what’s also important: Even though driving itself no longer causes excessive excitement for me, driving with time pressure, traffic, and, above all, other road users. It’s not enough to just handle your own car calmly; you also have to deal with the „rest of the world“ on the Ruhr area roads. And as we know, after football and the weather, traffic jams – traffic in general – is a number one topic of conversation and usually not a pleasant one.

Yes, I now also get annoyed with other drivers and am certainly not always calm, but a saying that I like helps me when everything comes to a halt or reckless „right-side overtakers“ drive my pulse up: „If you’re stuck in traffic – remember, you are the traffic.“ And the responsibility for coexistence on the road is something we share. I start with myself. I can’t change others, but if I take a deep breath when the grandma in front of me drives 30 in a 50 zone, thank someone when they let me through, and stay attentive and calm in traffic jams – I feel better when I arrive, and at least I haven’t contributed to making the „battle“ on the road even tougher. Peace!

Yes, mindfulness helps in traffic too. That’s good.

Enjoy mindfulness!

Kristin